A spoonful of restlessness

Tuesday, March 24, 2015


Saturday morning, how splendid. I woke up and made myself yummy but unhealthy breakfast. 

They're in a bowl of skim milk and sliced bananas, by the way. 

I did laundry and washed my bedsheets, as soon as I rolled off my queen-sized bed. 

These few days, I've not been sleeping well. The muscles on my back were aching and I feel super stressed about everything. (Which explains why there's Tiger Balm on my bed ahah) Unnecessary stress, I must admit. I tried to immerse myself in books but it wasn't long-lasting. There's just a plethora of distractions coming left and right, attacking me from all directions. It's also very frustrating for me to not be as efficient and focused in my studies, like I usually am. Instead, I became more and more fainéant and less productive. 

I recalled my brother said two years ago,"Emotions and Responsibilities should be different entities". Although I am in the state of low spirits, I should really, really read the entirety of my notes. Not just merely read for the sake of reading, but to also absorb and store them in my hippocampus. If I don't do so now, I don't think I'll be able to fully recall these information when sitting for my exam in exactly two months time. Now, I don't even want to think about my assignments simply because I am not in the mood to complete in, but I have to do it. I must. It's my responsibility to fulfil this. 

Is it alright to give myself a break? How much money and time should I invest in elevating my own mood? How much slack must I cut myself so I wouldn't slack even more? How do I evaluate what I'm feeling now is the deprivation of emotional or physical needs? What should I do to motivate myself, and at the same time spark my drive to learn more?

I can't stand being at this state much longer. As the feelings of restlessness down upon me, I feel heavy. This ain't right. 

C'mon Abby, cheer up! You can do this! 

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About Me

I'm Abby Ooi and I was born in Penang Island in 1995. Currently, I'm residing in Singapore. A degree pursuer, traveller, and a croissant addict. Family is paramount in my life.